My Drive Through the Foreign Fields of Ann Arbor

Although I should be sleep at this very hour, do to the fact that I have a 4 hour math class in the morning I have yet chosen to write another note. In fear that I will forget and utterly important part of the story I must write tonight lol. Well, I was suppose to leave my house at 5:30 but for perhaps the second time in my life I was running alittle late and didn't step into my 2001 royal blue Ford Focus until 6 pm. My drive began perfectly (probably because I knew where I was at). It wasn't until I finally reached Plymouth Rd where all my troubles began.OR perhaps even before then!!! Handy Dandy mapquest didn't predict the right number of miles so of course it took me forever to find Plymouth Road, right when I was about to give up and go home there was the road I said thank you Jesus as if this were the end of my problems. I immediately despised the fact that plymouth was only ONE LANE and boy do people like to speed in their top notch fancy cars (yes I'm doing alittle hating) nevertheless I traveled what seems to be like forever flying down this street with so many twists and turns searching for my next street!! I finally pull over on the side of this one lane rd to let the speeders go by so I can drive in peace. SO i finally find my next street a make a right turn in my mind i'm thinking oh i'm doing good almost there!!!!!!!!! But I travel only perhaps one mile to find some kind of parade going on (which I drive through) and my road is blocked YES BLOCKed I'm in the middle of ann Arbor neighborhoods with no clue where I am so i just follow the car in front of me and amazingly (wanting to go home AGAIN i figure If I turn around now i'll be just as lost) the next street I'm looking for pops up (ANOTHER THANK U JESUS) I scream in my car in the process I run two red lights because i'm nervous but all the people are nice enough to give me dirty looks instead of hunk! Again I travel down this longggggggggggggggggggg street Ann Arbor Rd or something .... i mean the street is too long I notice that their isn't not one street light and glady thank God that it isn't dark! Anyway in the course of driving all street signs disappear to my right rows and rows of corn and to my left some weird small animals eating grass, I had the worst feeling that perhaps I'd never find my way to church or back home thank God I had a tank full of gas!!! Anyway I went through construction pass pastures and mansions. Just to end up and another Rd block, a road that I once again I needed to get to Solid Rock Apostolic Church I looked to my left and saw a sign that read DETROIT that wasn't the church but I was so happy because any sign that read DETROITmeant that I could go home. Instead I went straight dialed my moms number and told her I'm coming home (about to cry really wanted to go to church) Amazingly my mother remembered How tO get to the church so i did a u-turn which by the way I was on the wrong side of the street and finally got HUNKED at!! Yes I reached church just in time actually it was 7:35 but they hadn't even begun to sing yet.... Throughout the course of the service I was thinking gosh I'm going to have to sleep in my car and miss class tomorrow no way I can make it home the moon isn't bright enough for me to see these streets. At the end of service I prayed, and Prayed somemore and when I opened my eyes I thought maybe my brain was inventing a person I actually knew. I took off my glasses squinted then put them back, I still kept staring at this person like no impossible couldn't be. I out of the ordinary, walked over and OMG it was Josiah ??? What yes, I was so excited to see a familiar face no not because I was lonely.... now I wouldn't have to sleep in my car after all !!! God definitely answers prayers God's moon light with the help of Josiah's tail lights led me safetly home!!!! I hope you got all of that there will be more to come for adventures with Ja'Nise Traveling alone to far away places with no street lights! Goodnight and GOd Bless!

~*Crazy, Crazy & Crazier*~

Feeling half way alone in this journey we call "life" some days I want nothing more than to throw myself over the edge of a steep curb in hopes that it will land me some place other than where I am! Today I want nothing more than to bury myself under loads of fluffy pillows and pretend as if no form of technology that one communicates with exists. I want to block society out of my mind and revert back to the moments when I was to small to think or speak. All I could do was observe nothing was right or wrong it just......was. Right now I am so aloof that I can't even state the purpose of this blog. Its just a string of random thoughts interconnected with some emotion that can't quite be explained because I'm not to sure how I'm feeling at the moment just...... extremely tired!! I have no clue why I find it necessary to write pages full of words that may have no meaning to a cyber world that doesn't care one way or another whether may days are full of happiness, or something less than happiness. I guess it just comes down to saying there is always something to complain about, man is never satisfied. IF only I could get to the place to say I'm content, to feel content even when things are the worst. I'll know that I have grown in the things of God when I can say, that I am "content!!" Right now I'm simply standing still waiting for some wind strong enough to come blow me in the right direction!

"Faith Can See What the Eyes Cannot."by:Ja'Nise W.

Dating Amongst Young Adults

Although now twenty, I have yet to find myself engulfed in romance. I have never been in a relationship nor on a date. Although the world may consider my view of dating as oddly outlandish or completely ridiculous I find it to be quite rationally logical in everyway. I think it to be totally insane to hop from one girl/guy to the next whether it be the excuse of looking for a husband/wife or just wanting to have "fun" (with peoples emotions unintentionally). Dating has become so overated in the 21st century. I have to ask myself what exactly is a girlfriend/boyfriend, I mean if I were to be in a relationship what is the role I would play; especially if it is a blind relationship (which I will soon define for you.) The question I still can find no answer to today is.... how will a series of short term relationships define, help, or enhance the one relationship that matters most MARRIAGE? No wonder why the divorce rate is so high in America because after 2 months husbands are bored with their wives. . or vise versa. Am I bashing those who have gone through divorce absolutely not, i'm bashing the word "dating" or rather how many people define the term. Sure being Apostolic may have alot to do with how I view the term but in my eyes we are the very ones abusing it most (speaking more to my generation of youngsters more so than anyone else) Is God not suppose to be about every decision that we make? Yet when it comes to this I guess we are free to go with what we "feel" rather than asking for direction! I guess this would be a good time to pause and define "Blind Relationships" a blind relationship is two people or it could be just one person within the relationship with no intention or no purpose of knowing this girl/guy for a reason; they're just a phase.. she/he definitely is not marriage material in there eyes. She is just what he wants for the moment (or vise versa) then he'll move on once he finds a "prettier" phase!

I am always posed with this question when I explain my take on dating.... Well how will you ever find someone to marry if you never date?

Well DUHHH can't it be that hard of a question!?!? :) Number one I will never date some random guy just because............ My husband if I ever shall have one will first be my friend,, then my best friend, then...... most likely if we like each other the dates will began to see if their is meant to be more. But the dates will began with a purpose, their will be a point and we will be on the same page. NOO every relationship doesn't have to be this way of course and I'm sure if he is not the one I'll date someone else but the POINT I'm trying to emphasize is dating shouldn't be randomly sharing your heart and emotions with someone just because. That is a waste of time, and emotion that could have been avoided. There are times in our lives where God wants us to be single.... so we can focus on loving him with our WHOLE entire heart, being single (is hard i know lol) is a lovely gift but so many don't realize it, nor take advantage of it!!

~~$The Ghetto$~~

I must admit today out of all day's I despise living in the heart of this ghetto community we have named Detroit :P oh sure many of you facebookers may disagree with me but perhaps if you were sitting here now or rather about 10 minutes ago in the midst of the screaming you to would be writing a facebook note in hopes that all the ghetto people in the world would suddenly transform from your words of wisdom. Nonetheless, I don't even know where to begin or how! I'm sitting in my room trying to study; when shouting erupts from outside my window at first I blocked it out thinking for some odd reason that people were just playing around! But the profanity only got louder and then I realized perhaps this wasn't a game?!?! I glanced out the window to see a woman well over her teenage years (it appeared) to be swinging a pole over her head yelling SCREAMING sHoutINg at another young (or old) woman to , "Take her crazy pills before she gets arrested!" SUddenly, I realized these kinds of events make me embarrassed for my culture! Am I saying I hate being "BLACK" oh absolutely not lol I'm saying I hate that black is so closely associated with violence and hate! I mean come on now its so true , In school if another black person "Usually" a girl walks in seems like the first thing she does is grim me............ What normal human being does that??! ANYWAY, I began to think how I miss our quiet little townhouse (outside of Detroit). Okay to get back on track, the other woman (without the pole) whom I couldnt see suddenly appears with a gas can THAT'S RIGHT a gas can a matches ....... I couldn't believe what she did. SHe set the other womans grass on fire.. !! Of course she ran after that so she wouldn't get beat with a pole but besides that fact, people don't act like people they act like animals around here! I am so glad that winter is nearing that's when all the "BLACk bears" go in for hiberation. That's the time when the ghetto is actually a happy place to live.(lol )That's when I actually sit on the porch as if it were summertime drinking in the sight of the ghetto's of Detroit holding the beauty of silence. OH and I just learned more from the ghetto woman the gas can....... she was in our garage ... my mom and dad were doing the yard today ! My dad walks into the garage and tells her to get out SHE cuts HIM with a little knife!!! Will I ever invite anyone to my house when its not winter time.. umm i'm not sure I would hate for them to see a live shooting of "Cops" on my time... BTW the cops arrived after the entire event which lasted alittle over an hour umm perfect timing Detroit Police! Perhaps God has placed us here for a reason...... I'm no Ghandi but I sure do hope my prayers bring peace! The bible's new form of living in the wilderness should be living in the ghetto you have got to learn to survive! lol ~Ja'Nise~

A Purpose Without A Plan

Everything seems less important
When I look at it the way in which you've described
No... nothings in order
Everything is just the same
But the way you've worded it has changed
My frame of mind
I look in front of me and there is confusion
A mere illusion of me ever being free
But unlike my mortal eyes my faith can see
All that God has in store for me
In the process of going through many spiritual test
My attitude becomes sour
Devouring every hope for God to make a way
I speak negativity into my heart with every word I say
With every form of worry and stress
I know within my heart that I have just failed another test
The songs that use to sooth my soul
Leave me feeling incomplete
Trying to be discrete in all my actions
Yet the world puts me on blast
I crumble under pressure
Not knowing how long this hurt will last.
But no matter how horrible my body feels
God I'll never leave your side
Because no matter how large my problems seem
You Lord are my redeemer.
God you've given me my purpose
Now I simply wait for You to command upon
My life Your plan!

By:Ja'Nise Washington

Urgh (The Best Title I could think of at the time)

Nothing can ail this undescribable feeling of need
Struggling to get what everyone claims
I need to succeed
I have no say so in this life I live
Thats not my own
Linched by the lack of encouragement
To strive for my own goals
To reach for the heights of the
Things that make my spirit whole
Even when my eyes are dry the tears
Are ever flowing
The dreams that once existed
The wind has blown away
And the faith so strong that was in me yesterday
Has now decreased
Unpleased with every result
That death seems more appealing than
The continual beating of my heart
Then everyone would have no choice
But to pick away at the lifeless me
And determine every way they'd like for me to look
And who they want for me to be
I stand still spinning in a circle of unconsistance
A circle of happiness, shame, victory, and defeat
When will I meet the day when I'm no longer
Standing in the desert
Shielding my face from the particles of sand
When will I cease to cry of pain
And cling to joy
I'm linched by the lack of encouragement
And drenched with fear and doubt
As everyone else sorts my life out at their own will
I follow their commands but somehow
I continue to stand still.